"Happy 103rd birthday, Mom!"
Well, no, she did not reach the triple digits but she lived a helluva good, long time.
March 5, 1916 was when she was born and she passed just a few days after her 96th birthday.
She would have smiled and wished everyone a "Happy St. Paddy's Day" at her funeral down in Yemassee, SC.
I returned to Charleston after my divorce in 1993 and was living on James Island in a neat little brick 800 sf building at the end of a winding dirt road.
Mom had retired as an LPN from St. Francis Hospital after working downtown for 25 years.
Yes, they gave her a 25-year service pin, a gold watch... and a rather small pension.
She once complained to me how $139 a month after 25 years with the hospital, was not very much money.
I agreed it was small by today's standards but she had been collecting it each month for nearly 30 years!
We did the math: $139 x 12 months equaled $1,668 a year.
Times the 30 years she had received a retirement pension check would be a total of slightly more than $50,000!
That put a smile on her face and she said
"OK, where's the fifty grand?"
(The photo above shows Mom playing around, pressing her face on the hospital copy machine many, many years ago.)
The photo on the left shows Mom joining me for a beer on a Sunday afternoon at the now-closed
Backstage Deli in North Charleston.
Not a drinker, she had agreed to pose with me and a yard of ale I had bought for this photo opp.
This was the only place I knew that gambled on using the tall, fragile glasses in a public bar.
You had to hand over your driver's license before they would start to fill the glass.
That deterred people from sneaking out the door with the costly souvenir glass.
It would have been difficult to hide it under your coat or sweater.
And, of course, you had to also steal the wooden glass holder.
Breakage finally called a halt to the use of these special glasses, I was told by the owner.
In this other "drinking" photo, Mom was hoisting a glass of Welch's fizzy grape juice that was as close to her version of an alcoholic toast that we shared to welcome a new year.
Needless to say, I had filled my glass with real wine.
A nice pinot noir to be precise.
On New Year's Eve, I would attend the Retirees Drop-in at the Post and Courier.
For many years, I brought home the bottle of "fake" wine the paper handed out.
After I had returned to town for a few years, my dad went into a nursing home.
Mom asked me to move in with her because she did not want to be alone in her home.
My brothers were married and living elsewhere so I was the available son to do that for her.
I did move in and she stayed in her home for another 10 years with me as her "roommate."
It was good for both of us.
One side of the house was finished as a bachelor pad for me.
(Dad was a carpenter and had expanded the 800 sf house they bought in 1962 to 2,000 square feet.
First thing he added was a 1,000 square foot workshop because that's where he made his money.)
After I moved in, I had a deck built on the back of the house so mom could relax on sunny afternoons. Two overhead fans made sure she was comfortable out there.
Another fan was added to the front porch so she could "move with the sun" from one to the other.
I had a good deal, a nice house and my mom asking if I would be home for dinner that night.
She liked to cook and now she had a son at home to cook for.
My cousin Francine (Pookie) continued her visits to see mom as she had done for years when we all lived downtown at Meeting and Society Streets in Ansonborough.
She had driven mom to visit dad at the Mt. Pleasant nursing home for several years until he passed away.
Not surprising, when mom could not continue to stay at home, even with paid caregivers, the choice for Assisted Living was Sandpiper, the same one she had selected for her husband.
Very social, Mom had a delightful, spacious room, filled with her furniture, pictures she loved on the walls and mementos she treasured.
Unfortunately, after only 5 months there, she suffered a stroke and was moved to the nursing home part of the facility.
She was diligent in her physical therapy and regained most of her speech and the use of her left side.
I noticed that once a week, adorable dogs were brought to Sandpiper to comfort residents.
I like that, so one day, I packed up Wallaby, her cat, and brought him to visit her.
Might have been the first cat to visit.
She was asleep when I arrived. I carefully took him out of the carrier, put him on the bed and gently placed her hand on his head.
Memory - or his purring - awoke her and she smiled as she petted her feline friend.
I visited mom often and joined her for lunch many times.
Got to know the staff over the 4 years she was there and they did not mind when I took mom on a very FAST cruise around the facility.
Well, maybe they were concerned but I was careful and only did this when we were alone.
She would laugh and say "Go faster."
Which I did.
My younger brother Dennis moved from Clearwater, Florida, up to Summerville and he and his wife would come to visit mom.
We all would join her for meals and holidays like Thanksgiving and Christmas.
Dennis captured a sweet moment when a colorful clown posed with her on a New Year's Eve.
He is on the right.
I later found out he was the husband of one of the staff who took care of mom.
When mom passed, she was buried on March 17 at her beloved Yemassee, where she had grown up as a child.
It's a place I stop and visit when I am heading down to Savannah.
Not as often as I should, but mom would understand.
She did not live to see me start being picked as an Extra in various tv shows and movies here in Charleston and down in Savannah.
She would have encouraged me to do this and hope - with me - that maybe someday I would even be featured and given a line or two.
Mom's are like that.
(Click on the photos or links for more information.)
I did not finish this entry in time for her birthday so I wanted to make sure it was posted before the anniversary of her funeral.
Thanks Mom.
Labels: Backstage Deli, Francine "Pookie" Miler, NYE clown, Sandpiper Assisted Living and Nursing, Savannah, Wallaby the Cat, yard of ale glass, Yemassee birthplace and burial
I'm in a GREAT gene pool.....
This is page 3 of a short essay my mother wrote September 30, 1976. It was about 1,200 words.
The subject was "Life Begins At 40" and she was sending it to McCalls Magazine.
Don't know if it ever was published but I think I would have heard something about this piece had it been.
Mom had encouraged all three of her sons to read - and we all still do - but I didn't know that she was also a writer.
Maybe even a published one.
I like this page because of the highlighted portion that describes her first lunch hour at her new job.
My younger brother was still in school and he and my dad were waiting for the midday meal.
Mom goes on to say she learned a lesson that day - and so did the others.
Nursing was her real goal. She became a Nurse's Aide when she was 40 and working outside the home.
Her essay goes on to explain that St. Francis Hospital was impressed with her work, her caring attitude and how quickly she learned new tasks.
They offered her a chance to be part of a pilot program to train to be an LPN (Licensed Practical Nurse.) They even waived the age limit.
Mom then had to decide if a year of desk work, studying and - groan - tests was what she wanted to do.
She chose that route and the essay describes her dedication and enjoyment of being in the nursing profession at St. Francis.
She once mentioned to me the first time she went to give a male patient a bath when she was an Aide.
Hard to say who was more nervous.
She put the man at ease when she assured him:
"Don't worry. I'll wash as far as possible..then you wash 'possible.'"
My mother had a great sense of humor.
After retiring, she was patient when I asked her to pose for weird shots.
Even a picture that looked normal when I took it.
Post-production photography software tools enabled me to move elements around, creating something entirely different from what she expected.
She would laugh and encourage my silliness.
There was one picture she wasn't too keen about.
This was a church-going lady who didn't drink.
One Sunday as I picked her up after a service, I mentioned I was going to stop for a beer. Would she mind tagging along?
She said she wondered where I spent some of my evenings.
This was no surprise altered photo.
She knew what I was doing when I asked her to pose with a yard of ale glass at the now defunct
Backstage Deli in North Charleston.
No, she didn't drink any of the beer but all around us patrons were chanting
"GO, GRANNY, GO."
Actually, she had a glass of tea. Unsweetened.
As for the tall glass of beer, I drank it along with lunch I bought for me and my mom.
Wasn't the first time I had one of those but this was as close as she came to one. Just posing.
(I have one of these glasses at home. The owner, a year or so later when he was closing down the place, asked if I wanted one. Of course, I said YES.)
Mom passed away about 31 years after she retired. She had worked out of the home and had some nice times in retirement
She was 83 when she flew to Hawaii for two weeks.
"Should I go?" she asked me and I said
"Nah...wait until you're 93."
She went on the all-expense paid trip that had been offered by her sister and had a grand time.
When she was 89, my younger brother surprised her with a trip to Rome.
She was in St. Peter's Square at the Vatican and saw the Pope on Mother's Day.
This is the same brother who was waiting for his mom to come home for lunch to make a meal for him and our dad.
Nice payback, Bro!
It's safe to say she got around in her retirement.
(Click on the photos for more details.)
I guess another trait I inherited from my mother was the travel gene.
Hmmm..but I have not been to Hawaii or Italy.
Yet.
Labels: Backstage Deli, Hawaii, Licensed Practical Nurse, LPN, Mother's day, Pope Benedict, Rome, St. Francis Xavier Hospital, St. Peter's Square, Vatican, yard of ale glass
Just Playin' vs the Olympics....
Several people asked me about the "shuffle board" I mentioned seeing at
Gene's Hafbrau.
I grew up playing on these so I assumed it was very clear.
Obviously not. Some people pictured long-handled sticks used to push pucks around on an outdoor court at a retirement village.
Or a game played aboard a cruise ship.
Nope. This is what I saw at Gene's. They also had the "required" pool table of course.
Some places go a little overboard on those.
Many of the North Charleston bars still have the smokey atmosphere so I hardly ever go there.
Some businesses opt to ban smoking so I do go there. It's a matter of choice.
And breathing clean air.
My dad played billiards. On a full-size table.
His favorite was
Snooker. I noticed the 6 pockets were a LOT smaller so you had to really be good to win.
Also the rules were very complicated compared to "Eight Ball" which is recognized everywhere and easy to keep straight.
Neither pool nor shuffleboard is an Olympic sport.
The only gold medals in the bars are called
"bling."(Click on the pictures for more detail.)
I stopped shooting pool when I started wearing bifocals.
Suddenly the game became more challenging.
Labels: Backstage Deli, bifocals, billiards, bling, eight ball, London Olympics, pool, pucks, shuffleboard, snooker
So, let's recap my blogging: I've written about my dad towing me and my broken down junker car - twice - and still bragging that I'm his son.
"Showed" my Mom supposedly sipping a yard of ale at the old Backstage Deli in North Charleston..and she is 92, a
church lady and doesn't drink beer or anything else that's fermented.
Let's see, I posted a photo of my younger brother as he - allegedly - impersonated a US Marine and I implied (actually said) my older brother stole pop bottles as a youth on Folly Beach.
Hmmm. Because I try not to mention any of my ex-wives I'm running out of subjects for discussion. Or dissection.
Oh wait, there's my two grandsons in Missouri.
They told me they could fly. And...they did.
Naturally I was skeptical.
They live in
"The Show Me" state so I asked for a demonstration of them kicking free of gravity.
Technically they were in free fall above a trampoline so I'll give them that one.
I'll have to check to make sure
all my children have been involved in
fun-on-dad's-blog.
[Please click on the red headline above to see a video on a photography project I started back in February. There are some VERY talented people involved. Since I'm older than most of them, the
twentysomethings try to keep me up to date on the newest online and computer developments! Thank goodness I found a digital camera on my own.
Let me know what you think. Thanks.]
Labels: Backstage Deli, free of gravity, grandsons, Missouri, Show Me State, thedigitel.com, trampoline, twentysomethings, yards of ale
Mom had retired as an LPN from St. Francis Hospital after working downtown for 25 years.
It was good for both of us.
