chuckography

From A Nigerian Bank ? Win A Lottery?

Wow. It sure looks "official."

It's one of those envelopes that has printed on the front "See other side for opening instructions."

On the back are arrows pointing out that you have to "remove side edges first."

So you carefully fold both ends and slowly tear ... it COULD contain a check and you don't want to rip that.

OK, back to the printed instructions:

"Then fold and tear this stub along perforation."

There even is a drawing of an envelope with torn edges marked 1,2 and 3.

Oh yeah, this is VERY important. Be careful now.

Gulp. Sweaty palms and shaking fingers.

Don't fool around. It's marked "Time Sensitive" for Pete's sake.

Warning: $2,000 Fine, 5 Years Imprisonment. Or Both. Seriously!

Maybe I should have a neighbor come in to witness that I am doing this right?

OK, here's Step #3...the perforated part across the top.

Oh. That's it?

The warranty on my 2006 car is about to expire? I can call Mon-Friday 8am to 7:30pm. They're open on Saturday from 9am to 2pm to "better assist me."

I can extend coverage for an additional 150,000 miles. Yes, there is a fee.

No check inside.


(Click on the image to see details and read the instructions)

Labels: $2000 fine, 5 years imprisonment, fold and tear, or both, Side edges, time sensitive, U.S.Mail TTT.18 U.S. Code. Warranty

posted by chucker @ 5:53 PM